Hello, welcome to day number 2 of Soul Searching!
I still soaring on the excitement of this new adventure that I have decided to undertake, it inspired me to start my Monday on the right note. To me, that means giant green smoothy for breakfast to get me rockin' and ready to go. This morning's green smoothy consisted of two navel oranges, one bunch of kale, a can of lite coconut milk, and a scoop of protein mix (I prefer Lifetime Life's Basic plant protein). I only had half of the smoothy followed with a go on the elliptical trainer, and saved the rest to add to my lunch. But it was so good, I could have topped the whole thing off, I love coconut!
As I mentioned in yesterday's post, I am in a transition phase of my life in more ways then one (many more than one). Not only am I trying to soul search and find inner peace as a whole, but I'm also moving back home to Kansas City from Boise and leaving my position as a graduate assistant at a major university. I've been here for a year and a half and tried to make my experience here work and be worthwhile, however, sadly it is not happening. So I have unfortunately, after trying to make it work for as long as I have, decided I am going to (or at least trying to) move on. Not only am I physically going to have to move on, but emotionally as well. I have developed some very strong and dear bonds with people here as well as to my position as a graduate assistant.
So what's the problem with this, it's just another phase of life right? Yes and no. I know Boise is not right for me, nor was my position, but a part of me still feels like I have failed because I'm leaving before my 2 year contract is up, with just a semester left. I have worked so hard in my undergrad to be able to get a graduate assistant position so that I could get my master's degree, a part of me feels like I'm giving up, and that I didn't try hard enough to make the best of everything. The other part of me knows the truth of the situation. I did try my hardest to make it work and I am not failing, I did a great job for the year and a half I worked there, sometimes as hard as we try, things just don't work out. My heart says "it's ok, I did my best", but my brain says "epic failure Burns". How to do I get the connection of my heart and my brain to reconnect?
So to give my brain and my heart a chance to stop bantering I decided I had to get out of my house. I needed a little me time which to me mean my all time favorite soy chia(chai) tea latte (in my re-usable ceramic mug) from my favorite hippie coffee joint in Boise, The Flying M. I feel so at home here, it's chic, it's eclectic, it's businessmen(woman), it's hippie, it's perfect. Coming here got my brain to shut up for a second and allowed my heart and soul the chance to enjoy a steamy cup of nirvana and be at peace (for a little while).
Have you ever had to get your heart to explain things to you mind? How did your battle go?
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