Listening makes everything taste better

I'm learning, slowly, but I'm learning. Today I was determined to listen to my body and give it what it wanted. I made a wonderful "egg" and veggie scramble which I wrapped up in a tortilla to make a breakfast burrito, which I had been dreaming about all night. It was good, but didn't really take the edge off. But I was feeling ok (but not stellar).

For lunch I had the rest of the scramble on top of spinach for lunch with an added avocado smushed in. Again, it was good, buuuut still didn't seem to get to that place that I was itching to get to.

After my session with my holistic counselor for my weekly meeting, I decided to treat myself for the second day in a row to my favorite coffee shop for my usual soy chai tea latte and a (safe) piece of vegan spiced apple and raisin bread (rather than the vegan "everything" cookie). Thank you Flying M for offering vegan options, but UHG, my treat did not treat me the way I had been hoping (don't get me wrong, it was good, but it didn't scratch that itch still).

So dinner came around and being that I'm moving and had most of my kitchen stuffed into reusable bags, I wanted to get something that I could just toss together, so of course I opted for a (safe) salad rather than the homemade hummus with pita bread and cucumbers that I'd picked up and put back down. I added an avocado, a tomato, and some hummus to the spring mix and dried cranberries.

... it looked good.... it tasted good... but at that point I hadn't listen to my body all day and the itch became too big to scratch. A thus came ...the binge. :(

I started the day on the right note (good job Burns!), I was really trying to listen to my body and give it what it was craving (again, good job!). But by not fully satisfying myself, playing it safe, and ignoring what my heart was trying to tell me, I inevitably set myself up for the binge. I was trying though and had all the right intentions, so I pat myself on the back (YAY!) for that, but I played it safe and tried to reason with the unreasonable.

I really wish I didn't have to learn all these lessons the hard way. Basically I'm relearning how to listen to my body and it's scary. I almost don't even know what to listen for because for the past 8 years I was the one telling my body what it wanted rather than the other way around (yeah...I really like eating salads every day.... not!). And it's scary because cravings to me are for some reason (enter ED) are associated with too many calories and weight gain.

So lesson learned, point taken, when I listen to my cravings and actually give in to them, the itch will be scratched, the sweet tooth will be tamed, and all will be right with the world. But for now, any suggestions on how to truly listen to my body and what it happens to be craving?


**Forgive the grainy pictures, I left my camera cord to upload my pictures to my computer back in KC, so I'm using my phone. But once I am reunited with KC, I promise for better quality visual aids :)